::Ginky::

2002-10-26T19:19:00.000-07:00

+++Lorah is going threw a meltdown.II I III II

I wish I could speak of what I feel these past days,but those stupid morrons didn't write enough words in the dictionnary to express what my soul actually sees and cries about...It's so frustrating that I can't tell other ppl what I really mean,it's like some idiot came in and stapled my mouth shut with permanant sharp pointed standard staples.

So I have found a new way to tell the world about those feelings; threw my little manga strips, I've made one already named "X girlfriend" it's about 12 pages long or should I say 12 pages short ,and although I didn't force myself much on that piece,I must admit that it is one of the works I shall safely keep,instead of throwing it out carelessly in the bin.I like it when ppl tell me it's good,it's as if they're telling me that it's okay to hurt sometimes.I'm trying to acknowledge ppls complement's now,though it's hard~With my soul full of mistrust and paranoiia~It's kinda hard.

My friend M-- is frustrating me more and more,at first I didn't pay much attention to his stupid comments since he is known to be like that within his nature,but bouncingsnarlets! He snaps at anything I say.He perverts my words and always tries to read between my lines and inserting negative views and suggests mean things.Now one who knows him well would just say it's just his *black humour* but I think that this time he's really pushing it one step too far.
I can't have a normal conversation about stuff I did without him nagging me about why he wasn't invited and how I probably convinced everyone not to invite him and that it's my responsibility to give him a call when were about to go out.

Okay number one::If I ask him to go out to the movies,he'll probably shoot his lame *Sorry,no can do;I'm playing a computer game agaist this other dude*just like he did when I invited him to my birthday.(Guess what?he got mad at me because I didn't convince him good enough to come at my birthday)

Number two::He never gave me his phone number,ever!So how can I call him up ,when my friends and I make last minute plans?

Number three::I don't know him all that well,sometimes I go to the movies with some ppl who he himself claim to be his *good buddies since primary school*,yet they don't even call him up!It's more their responsability to call him than mine,no?

Well he could shove a whaw whaw pedal up his arse,him and his accusations.

2002-10-04T06:32:00.000-07:00

At school again,it`s friday and I`m bored as hell.Ugh.

2002-09-11T13:53:00.000-07:00

hello

2002-09-06T14:14:00.000-07:00

I've changed website ,i'll give put my new address here eventually.

2002-09-06T13:03:00.000-07:00

Who's your Pucca Character? Take the quiz! Brought to you by Lovepucca.net!

2002-09-05T12:03:00.000-07:00

I think I may change my website url ,get a new one ya know...Just thinking though .

2002-09-05T06:01:00.000-07:00

Im at school now .

2002-09-03T14:23:00.000-07:00

The way that you
Embrace me with your strong and powerful arms
Your haunting words
Keep me close
To everything about you
Romantic in ways
In ways that almost tear upon my heart
Can't let you go
Don't you know
A captive in your gentle hands
A prisoner of your soulful eyes
Your special smile
We'll never part
If the morning sun should free me
It really wouldn't let me go
I'd still be caught inside your love
Can't rise above
The chains of your heart

2002-09-03T14:02:00.000-07:00

I saw a picture on this so called *neat picture site* and I don't think it's neat...A dead moose getting his head chopped off by an axe .Yurk!

2002-09-03T13:58:00.000-07:00

I never ever made a friend at Jean Coutu's...

2002-09-03T13:53:00.000-07:00

If only knew what I was thinking...If only I knew what he was thinking...If only I knew what I was thinking .

2002-09-03T13:33:00.000-07:00

Once again ,my family is invited to another wedding ,due in 2004,yep and they are sending a mercedes to get us ,cus the stupid idiot rich ppl want to show how rich they are to impress the family by having a mercede only wedding .How dump and superficial ,guess my family is going to be bored at my wedding...

2002-09-01T12:33:00.000-07:00

Which X/1999 characters are you?

Quiz made by Chesa

2002-09-01T11:21:00.000-07:00

Paranoid
Paranoid personality disorder is characterized by a distrust of others and a constant suspicion that people around you have sinister motives. People with this disorder tend to have excessive trust in their own knowledge and abilities and usually avoid close relationships with others. They search for hidden meanings in everything and read hostile intentions into the actions of others. They are quick to challenge the loyalties of friends and loved ones and often appear cold and distant to others. They usually shift blame to others and tend to carry long grudges.

Antisocial
A common misconception is that antisocial personality disorder refers to people who have poor social skills. The opposite is often the case. Instead, antisocial personality disorder is characterized by a lack of conscience. People with this disorder are prone to criminal behavior, believing that their victims are weak and deserving of being taken advantage of. They tend to lie and steal. Often, they are careless with money and take action without thinking about consequences. They are often agressive and are much more concerned with their own needs than the needs of others.

Avoidant
Avoidant personality disorder is characterized by extreme social anxiety. People with this disorder often feel inadequate, avoid social situations, and seek out jobs with little contact with others. They are fearful of being rejected and worry about embarassing themselves in front of others. They exaggerate the potential difficulties of new situations to rationalize avoiding them. Often, they will create fantasy worlds to substitute for the real one. Unlike schizoid personality disorder, avoidant people yearn for social relations yet feel they are unable to obtain them. They are frequently depressed and have low self-confidence.

Obsessive-Compulsive
Obsessive-Compulsive personality disorder is similar to obsessive-compulsive anxiety disorder. People with this disorder are overly focused on orderliness and perfection. Their need to do everything "right" often interferes with their productivity. They tend to get caught up in the details and miss the bigger picture. They set unreasonably high standards for themselves and others, and tend to be very critical of others when they do not live up to these high standards. They avoid working in teams, believing others to be too careless or incompetent. They avoid making decisions because they fear making mistakes and are rarely generous with their time or money. They often have difficulty expressing emotion.

2002-09-01T11:16:00.000-07:00

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid:	High
Schizoid:	Moderate
Schizotypal:	Moderate
Antisocial:	High
Borderline:	Low
Histrionic:	Moderate
Narcissistic:	Moderate
Avoidant:	High
Dependent:	Low
Obsessive-Compulsive:	High
-- Click Here To Take The Test --

2002-09-01T10:48:00.000-07:00

I'm just a girl

Yes I'm some kinda freak

cause they all stare with their eyes

I'm just a girl ,my apologies

take a good look at me

just your typical prototype

I'm just a girl ,that's all that you'll let me be

I've had it up to here

2002-09-01T10:34:00.000-07:00

I'm a flaccidball flan kicker .

2002-08-31T11:33:00.000-07:00

You know whos cute? The guitarist in Sam Roberts ,that has puffy ,curly brown hair .

2002-08-31T11:28:00.000-07:00

If I had a giant metal needle I'd pop the sun on hot days like this ,but I'd need a giant pump also, to pump it up again on yucky days .

2002-08-30T11:59:00.000-07:00

You and me ,
We used to be

Well first day of school and here I am sitting back at home ,earlier than I was meant to be .Why?Because I was one lucky ducky,yes I happen to be one of few students that have received a retarded schedule with few holes* in it ( free periods ).So today I have no last period. May I add that strawberry is an impotent wishy washy,unsensitive selfish,insolent, week-minded straight-A a**hole that I do not appreciate very much.

Together everyday together ,always I really feel ,*I'm losing my best friend.*
I can't beleive this could be ,the end

As I walked back home alone I met a couple of students rushing back to school late,and when they saw me I think they thought the bell hasn't rung yet *It has* and they stopped running ...I guess They presumed that they had time seeing that I was in no rush ...Theyre gonna go into detention because of me.

It looks as though youre letting go
and if it's real ,well I don't want to know
Don't speak~I know just what youre saying
So please stop explaining
Don't tell me cause it hurts
As we die~Both you and I~With my head in my hands-I sit and cry
It's all ending
I gotta stop pretending
Who we are ,you and me
I could see us dying
Are we?

2002-08-29T13:04:00.000-07:00

thank god for herbal essence !

2002-08-29T12:52:00.000-07:00

Why do we have to be inhibited ?

2002-08-29T08:41:00.000-07:00

If I were sendings vibes right now ,I think I'd be sending the *don't approach this girl because she is dangerously bored of life and it's contagious* vibes.

2002-08-28T17:16:00.000-07:00

I love you ,always forever

Some things are better left unsaid ,it's like if someone took off the band aid and scratched the scabs off your unhealed scar .It hurts .*Sigh.*

You and I ,closer together

I got one random picture to take ,that's left on my random camera .I shall make this one a good worthy one .

Near or far ,always better

I saw a chinese kid get grounded by his dad in chinese .It's quite a strange scene .I felt bad for the kid but what can I do?I've meddled in too many ppls lives already.

2002-08-28T14:26:00.000-07:00

::But tell me does she kiss like I used to kiss you::

I set my alarm clock to 7oclock this morning and I ended waking up at 7:40 ,I have holes in my schedule and so on my very first day of school I shall have no last period .Meaning that I could leave at 12:15 instead of 2:30 ,if I have a parents note which I will have .I rule .

::Does it feel the same when she calls your name::

It twas a hot day,
It twas a long day,
It twas a painful day,
It twas the first time my feet entered the school day.
I better not have a sweaty smelly boy beside my locker this year.(Or girl,but guy sweat has a somewhat stronger stench)

::Somewhere deep inside you must know I miss you::

I took pictures .Very random pictures .Of random things .In my random pictures .